I want to help you make your love life better.
I struggled with the anxiety for years. Happiness seemed just around the next corner. At some point you start to think…
- You’ll never “find the one.”
- You’re not successful enough.
- You’ll be happier when…
And that’s how you discovered self-development books and programs, which only kind of work for you.
But, with each answer comes more questions.
You start to feel a little broken.
But it’s not your fault!
Self Development Gurus are mostly FULL OF SHIT!
I’d like to believe that they mean well.
But, when they continue to give bad advice and perpetuate unfounded myths about the science of success, it makes me think that my heroes of Self-Development are just old fashioned snake oils salesmen.
Hi, my name is Tim McAuley.
On my 37th birthday, I finally stopped searching for happiness and decided to do the opposite of what most Self-Help Teachers teach. I stopped practicing the power of positivite thinking and began to use what I call Applied Pessimism.
For a while, I threw out all my goals, and pretended that I’d never be, do, or have more than I had at that moment.
And then something weird happened.
A few weeks later, my normal sense of overwhelm and anxiety had almost vanished. I felt pretty damn good, even though I was still single and sharing a little dumpy trailer in South Eastern Ohio with my Dad.
If you want to take back your reality, the first step is to OWN YOUR SHIT.
Sink into the life you have. Be where your feet are and accept it for what it is. Then start examining your own existential angst so you can learn to shift your anxiety into excitement.
Enjoy the life you live.
Stop looking around at what others have and appreciate what’s yours.
It’s a subtle shift, but it’ll make the world of difference in helping you get out of your own way and start living a more fulfilling life.
The Power of Acceptance: OWN IT.
Savor good things; make a game out of enjoying the not-so-good.
When you do that, you begin to understand freedom. It’s not about being positive all the time so that good things manifest, it’s about noticing the good things that are already there and taking actions that are most likely to create more good things.
It’s about consistent action.
Before you invite more love, or more success into your life, you might want to work out a new story to tell yourself.
Tame Your Inner Critic.
We all have a narrative that defines us.
Change will happen even if you don’t change the way you see yourself, and you don’t pay close attention to the way you show up on a daily basis.
But, you’ll have much more influence on your future, if you spend the time and energy to reframe the way you see yourself and how you fit into the world.
If you are ready to invite the possibility of love into your life and focus on creating the life of your dreams, please get crystal clear on what you want, why, and what you need to do/be to get it.
March 2013, after a month of going all in on my life, things changed. My Dad asked me to leave Ohio by winter.
He said something to the effect of;
“This place isn’t for you. Get back to the water. Keep writing. Find a woman. You’re a great man, and you deserve more than this. Go get it.”
It was weird.
I’d finally gotten to the point where living in that dumpy trailer, working that crappy job, and being single was perfectly fine with me. No desire for more. No resistance. Just joy.
But, the idea of getting back out to explore the world seemed great! So, I did what any self-help junky would do, I created a Dream Board.
A month later, I realized something strange. My vision was incomplete. I create this video.
The video above depicted my 5 year plan. Within the first year most of it was my reality:
My wife and I met 4 months after the video. She lived at Smith Mountain Lake. A few months after we moved in together, she unknowingly bought the same car and the same paddle board from my video. And I got hooked up with a Paddle Board Company.
Today is March 30th, 2018. I’m sitting next to my father in a nursing home, realizing how much I’ve grown in the past 5 years, and where I fell short on my goals.
On April 6th, I’m going back to the place where this started, and repeat the same process to create a vision of what life will be like in 2028, so I can get to work co-creating it.
I’d love to share my journey with you and show you how to do this in your life.
I have a knack for helping people solve problems.
I’ve been helping people since 2006 solve relationship stuff, business stuff, and just about everything in between.
Connecting dots and finding blind spots come naturally to me.
Don’t believe everything you read.
Not on this site, or any other site on the internet. Don’t believe it even if it’s in a book.
And PLEASE test all of your own assumptions; especially the assumptions about what is possible in your life and what you deserve.
Not everything in print is worth the paper, not every thought in your head is worth your time.
A whole bunch of New York Times Best Sellers offer really crappy advice!
And I’m willing to bet, that you have some assumptions that freeze you in your tracks and block you from living a more awesome life.
The crappy advice of good marketers has been pissing me off for years.
Take for instance the idea that we only use 10% of our brain.
I first learned about that in 2004 listening to either Deepak Chopra, Jack Canfield, or one of those nice people from the movie the Secret.
The 10% rule sounded reasonable to me, and then the teacher shifted to speak about the “Real Secrets of Success” and “How to Fake it til You Make It”.
They talked about creating a vision and upping your vibe.
I loved it, and I did my best to live it and preach it to EVERYONE!
Then, one day I read an article that Benjamin Radford wrote titled “The Ten-Percent Myth”.
It kind of pissed me off that self-help gurus continued to teach that shit even though it had been debunked several years ago.
Makes you wonder what else they teach that doesn’t hold merit.
Like the Movie “The Secret.” I really loved that movie, it gave me hope; filled my mind with possibilities of a brighter future.
Hell, I even wrote a book and published in 2011, that was filled with Hyperbolic Pseudoscientific Bullshit just like I’d learned from the Secret, Jack Canfeild, and Deepak Chopra.
I truly believed all that I wrote at that time.
And some of the techniques I shared in that book, I still use today.
You don’t have to worry about me repeating the mistake of getting sucked into BS guru stuff.
Soul Surfer School is dedicated to deliver stories, studies, and the science of personal development, without resorting to magical promises and instant healing!
The main focus of the Soul Surfer School is:
I did that by Taming the Inner Critic, Learning to Better Deal with Stress, so Figuring out How to Be Happier Now.
At Soul Surfer School we still take an inside out approach to living.
We believe that the quality of our lives reflects the quality of our thoughts.
And to some degree, we create our own happiness, then we can share it with the world.
There is no magical, fluffy, nonsense here.
We love science.
We embrace reality.
Soul Surfer School is on a mission to help people find lasting love, happiness, and success.
Are you with me!?